It's not hard to miss the way Derek goes quiet and I look over again to find him staring down at the countertop, his face pale. My heart thuds for a second, tripping into a flash of panic, but he only swallows and takes a breath before trying for a smile.

I want to tell him everything will be fine, but given what I've seen of Darrow in the past year alone, I know I can't. Nothing is certain here. Nothing at all. As happy as we both might be right now, it could all slip away in a second and we both know it.

So instead, I only give him a nod in return and try for my own smile. "I'll hope hard enough for the both of us," I tell him, knowing optimism isn't really his strong suit. "And until then, you just work at keeping happy, alright?"