Coughing out a laugh, I waited for a punchline that wouldn't come. It wasn't even... surprising, and I wasn't pissed, like he was obviously bracing for. I felt vaguely admonished by the way he seemed to be managing my reaction, when I wasn't angry. I was just... a little embarrassed.

I felt like I kept finding more and more ways that our friendship wasn't what I'd built it up to be, with all my bullshit. We kept secrets. We didn't understand each other as well as I'd thought. We weren't fucking epic soulmates who were going to end up alone in the city together, after everyone else was gone. And we didn't need to be. We were just... friends, and whether he believed it or not, I could let that be enough.

"Lucky him," I said, one corner of my mouth twitching into a faint smirk. "Were the rats part of the deal?"